Click here for Part 1, detailing  games 10 – 6 of the list.

Part 1 is done and dusted (what does the mean anyway), and you are no doubt down to the stubs of your nails due to biting them in anticipation of the conclusion of the TOP 10 WORSE GAMES TO APPEAR ON A NINTENDO SYSTEM as well as the end of this horrible, horrible run-on sentence.  Well, ladies and gentlemen, I give you the second part of the list.  Read on as we count down to the WORSE GAME in Nintendo History.  No more run-on sentences though.  Promise.

5.  Road Runner (SNES) – When I originally saw this game in NMS (Nintendo Magazine System) I became incredibly excited.  The Road Runner and Coyote cartoons are some of, if not the best cartoons of all time.  The SNES game copied the look of these classic cartoons precisely.  However, I should have known that like the cartoons, anything created after the death of Mel Blanc was mediocre, good for only those whom wished to have their eyes melted from their sockets.  The game itself, Death Valley Rally, is nothing but a Sonic clone.  A bad Sonic clone.  Road Runner runs and jumps through the desert (level after level after level), with his nemesis Wile. E. Coyote hot on his trail with an abundance of ACME machines.  However, so badly planned was the gameplay that you cannot see enough of the screen while running from this cunning carnivore, and quite often find oneself crashing into enemies which appear from offscreen.  I say often, but it is every single freaking enemy.  Frustration follows.  To top it off, the animation which I was so excited about blinks in and out, and it appears frames are missing from it.  The jokes get old very quick (does The Fat Lady really have to appear at the end of every level, ready to sing, only to be told by Wile. E “Not Yet”), as does the constant ‘meep meep’ of Road Runner itself.  If you were one of the unlucky few to purchase this game, I’d say you would now be filled with *deep deep* regret.  See what I did there.

4.  Donkey Kong 64 (N64) - No need to write why this game is horrible.  Just watch the following opening intro from the game.

This, ladies and gentlemen, is the DK Rap.  Put quite simply, Donkey Kong 64 is to Donkey Kong Country what The Phantom Menace is to A New Hope – except with far more fart jokes.  Nuff said.

3.  Wayne’s World (SNES) – Excellent. NOT! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH, do you remember the time when every cool kid in the school yard used this term?  You have this movie to thank for that.  Incredibly popular, and up there with Ferris Buller’s Day Off, this movie spoke to the Pepsi generation, who in turn purchased Pepsi and watched the film.  So I ask, how does one convert the awesomeness of a movie such as Wayne’s World to the humble SNES?  Answer; with Horrible side scrolling platformer.  Where do I start with this awful, horrible, puss-filled game.  Wayne isn’t in his black Wayne’s World T shirt.  Every time Wayne gets hit, he says ‘Not’ (AHAHAHAHAHAHA. Not.).  You run around the level bouncing on various musical equipment with no idea where to go or what to do.  The only way you know that you have reach the end of a level is when Wayne bows down saying “We’re not worthy”.  Although Garth can also be heard (as it is obviously just a soundbite straight from the movie) even though Garth has been kidnapped by a big purple jelly thing.  That’s correct – the final boss is Garth in a big pink glob of something, which in order to defeat you fire guitar riffs at.  You know, just like in the movie.  See;

“We’re not worthy”.  Correct, you win a prize.  It is a score of 17% from NMS (yes I remember the score a defunct magazine gave a horrible game many years ago).  Speaking of defunct, our next game is….

2. Home Improvement (SNES) – Oh God, I don’t even want to write about this game.  Based on the hit tv show, and possibly based of a ‘lost episode’ (let’s just pretend – it makes the game more fun).  The setup for this adventure is as follows; Someone has stolen the new range of power tool made by Binford carrying Tim ‘The Toolman’ Taylor’s name.  Tim now has to run around the studio looking for creates which may house the tools.  Cue your generic platform adventure, playing as Tim as he makes a half arsed attempt and finding his tools in the jungle his TV studio has apparently become…for some reason.  The final boss is a robot or something. I don’t know, I just want it to stop.

"Hey Al, check out my 'Hang Time'" "I don't think so, Tim"

Now…the Number 1 game on this list, and considered to be the worse game ever to appear on a Nintendo console is….

1.  Mario’s Time Machine (SNES) – Oooooooo contraversay.  A Mario game, by Nintendo as the no 1 Worse Nintendo Game.  Allow me to explain – I love Mario and all of his adventures.  I had never been disappointed by one of the plumbers adventures, and they continue to deliver the good to this day.  This game, however, is not my Mario.  The premise is as follows – Bowser travels through time trying to get his hands on historical artifacts for some reason, and Mario has to stop him.  Doesn’t sound too bad – however Mario stops him by learning about history and answering questions….yeahbuhwha?  Not only is it the most boring game in the history of everything, the fact Mario’s good reputation is tarnished makes this game even worse.  Thankfully this was one of few ‘Edu-tainment’ games Nintendo released, it is just a pity that they couldn’t have made Luigi the main character for this one.  It would not have mattered then, Luigi is a loser.

There you have it – now be sure to never play these games that are no longer in production which appeared on obsolete systems.  You’re welcome.